Tag Archives: roommate

Why Dan is the Best Roommate Ever

1. Dan is Alaskan

2. Dan tells wacky bedtime stories at random

3. Dan is fun to watch Wipeout, Survivor, and The Amazing Race with every week

4. Dan doesn’t clean the room, so I don’t feel bad about not cleaning the room either

5. Dan is blind without his glasses on, which allows for hilarious pranks involving large numbers of people hiding in the room and surprising him when he tries to go to sleep

6. Dan knows how to make YouTube gold

7. Dan is always willing to play one more game of Super Smash Bros.

8. Dan drags me along on crazy adventures involving fountains and the like

9. Dan has ridiculously curly hair

10. Dan gives me ideas like this one when I’m at a loss for a blog post and I only have twenty minutes left in which to come up with something

Thanks for making my freshman year a good one, Dan.

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11:48

I have twelve minutes to write this post, so I’ve decided to write the first twelve things that come to mind so that I can still have a post.

1. I don’t want to write this large paper that’s due on Monday.

2. I am very excited to go home this weekend.

3. If I want to have fun at home this weekend, I have to write this large paper.

4. Shoot.

5.  This double chocolate chip pancake is delicious.

6. My mind always goes blank when I’m halfway done with a list (like it just did right now).

7. My roommate is talking.

8. My neighbor, Adam, just gave me a bunch of music to listen to later.  I am very excited about that.

9. I’m not going to say anything about my upcoming birthday, even though my roommate told me to.

10. I am quite the rebel.

11. I just had to fight my roommate for the aforementioned pancake.  I think he drooled on it.

12.  I’ll miss you, pancake…

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And Here’s Our Next Contestant…

As I was watching “Wipeout” this evening with my roommate, it struck me just how weird game show contestants are.  Why are there no normal contestants on these shows?  Is it because no ordinary person would ever sign up to run a foam-covered obstacle course?  Or perhaps produce know that a group of average, everyday folks doesn’t make for good TV?  If that’s the case, it seems that there are three types of people who do make good TV, because nearly every game show contestant of all time falls under these categories:

1. Smart.  Ken Jennings, anyone?  More intellectual game shows like Jeopardy! or Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? have a few things in common.  The first is that they end with punctuation marks.  The second is that their draw comes from the intelligence of the contestants – we want to know if they’re smart enough to win it big.  That, and we feel smart when we get the questions right.  “I knew it before he did!  I should get a PhD…”

2. Tragic.  These type of contestants show up a lot on shows with high stakes.  “What would you do if you won the five billion dollar prize, Shirley?”  “Well, all three of my children are afflicted with the rarest and most incurable disease on the planet, our house just burned down, and I lost my job, so I would use the money to buy a new house, feed my kids, and research a cure for Severe Craniatus Insanicus.”  The really sad part is, they usually wind up with five hundred bucks, and then everybody feels awkward.  Still, people with a sad story always have a fall-back: “Extreme Makeover Home Edition”.

3. Hyper.  “Wipeout” is like the world headquarters for Spazz and Scream International.  There’s no way they’re casting you unless you can juggle, dance, dress up in a weird costume, or have a cheesy catchphrase that you scream incessantly.  These people are loud, these people are quirky, and most of these people spend all day climbing in and out of freezing water and getting smacked in the face by high density foam with no payoff.  Perhaps crazy would be a more accurate title than hyper.  Still, if you can put on a show – and don’t mind the hosts making fun of you while your friends and family watch, you might get your shot at the big grand prize.  So what are you waiting for?  Put on that cape, whip out that unicycle, and get yourself on a game show.

These are the three categories that I noticed, but I want to know: have you spotted any more?  What’s your favorite game show?  Let me know in the comments below, and I’ll see you tomorrow with a post about adventure.

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