I Am a National Hero


I won QWOP today.  It was actually a lot easier than most people make it out to be; I didn’t even need to use my calves.  I almost had a heart attack, though, when I saw the hurdle at 50 meters.  Seriously, how are you supposed to clear a hurdle when you’re sliding along the ground on one knee?  I just knocked it over and kicked it in front of me for a while until eventually it slipped under my legs.  I’m sure you’re allowed to do that in the Olympics.

Either way, now I’m officially a national hero.  I’m not sure when President Obama is going to arrive and present me with my medal, but I can’t imagine it’ll be any later than Tuesday.  I’ll keep you posted.

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One response to “I Am a National Hero

  1. Pingback: Summer in Review Part 4: Wal-Mart Runs and Other Adventures | The Author's Apprentice

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