Prologue: First Strike


Here it is, the prologue to my book!  Sorry for the delay, I hope you enjoy it, and please leave a comment or two letting me know what you think.  Thanks!

Bar-Reuel woke with a start.  Something was not right.  He looked to his right.  Mirami was there, sleeping peacefully.  He moved his gaze slowly over the room, taking in every detail, looking for anything out of place.  No one peered back at him through the window on the east wall, his hunting bow still hung in its place over the dresser in the back of the room, and there was nothing suspicious lurking in the shadows near the doorway to his left.  “Then why do I feel so… Reuel!”

Bar-Reuel leapt out of bed and dashed through the doorway to his son’s room across the hall.  Frantically, his gaze flew to the bed in the corner where Reuel should be.  No one was there.  Bar-Reuel rushed across the room to the window and threw it open, his son’s name already rising in his throat, when fear drove the last shreds of sleep from his mind and he remembered: Reuel had been apprenticed to a scribe in Eastmeadow nearly five years ago.  His apprenticeship had just ended, and soon he would be home again, but tonight he was sleeping in a bed fifteen miles away.

Bar-Reuel chided himself for his foolishness, shuffled back into his bedroom, and sat down on the bed.  As he was lying down, however, he heard a faint rustle from the hall.  The old uneasiness threatened to come rushing back, but this time Bar-Reuel controlled himself.  “I just forgot to close the window in Reuel’s room,” he muttered uncertainly.  Again he swung his legs over the edge of the bed, but this time a sharp pain filled his head and he tumbled face first toward the ground.

Bar-Reuel thrust out his arms in a desperate attempt to ease his fall, but his hands met with no resistance from the packed earth floor.  Instead, the dirt gave way to a black expanse and he continued to plummet, quickly losing sight of his bedroom above.  From out of the nothingness Bar-Reuel heard a low, self-satisfied chuckle, which seemed to be coming from far below him and directly above his head at the same time.

Suddenly, his room appeared out of the darkness below him, rapidly approaching.  He could see his wife on the bed, just as she had been when he had fallen just moments before, but something was different.  Now there was a man standing over her, holding his hand just millimeters above her forehead.  His frame was stooped, covered loosely with a thin, black robe, and he was muttering a spell in a deep, menacing tone.  As Bar-Reuel fell closer, the figure whirled around and looked him in the eyes.  The creature’s eyes bulged out of its pale, sunken face, and they burned with a dull red light.  It opened its mouth, and a rumbling growl escaped from between dozens of long, sharply pointed fangs.

Bar-Reuel froze in shock, horrified at the monstrosity that had invaded his home.  As the ground sped toward him, he searched his mind desperately for any way to drive the beast away, to save his wife, but none came.  He began to sob, helplessly watching as everything he cared about was torn away from him again.  Then he hit the ground, and everything went black.

P.S.  For anyone who doesn’t know how to find the other story excerpts amidst all of my posts, just click on the “The Book” category in the sidebar and you’ll find them.

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Prologue: First Strike

  1. Ah, yes. the hunting bow in the corner set it up nicely. Your effect of the fall was very masterfully done as well. The whole emotional essence of the scene was crafted with superb attention to detail. Thank you for sharing this!

    By the way… that creature was a Dream? Or not?

  2. Thanks, Emeth. The creature wasn’t in and of itself a dream, it was part of a nightmare… or rather the vision that the nightmare had implanted into Bar-Reuel’s mind. Just an extra way to make it scary for Bar-Reuel. 🙂 I tried to hint at the beginning of the nightmare sequence with the sharp pain in the head, but I’ll explain it more clearly later in the book. Thanks for your input!

  3. Tom Clark

    Dude, this prologue rocks! It literally gave me goosebumps along with an icy chill that ran along my spine! Nice work man! You are such a gifted writer. Keep up with this book and your blog! I loved your last blog about shalom and the quote. I can see you developing an amazing ministry through your writing. This is definitely what God wants you to do!
    Much love,
    Tom

  4. Kay Morris

    Haha, I have to laugh at myself. I found myself inching closer and closer to the screen, something I do with books when I’m being drawn in. I pull it closer and closer until I’m buried in it. I was almost wrapped like a christmas present with black text! 😉
    It was really good. I don’t think I was breathing that whole time. Probably dangerous to my physical well- being, not to mention my mental. You have a way of making it one of those, can’t- put- it- down books. Wish I could do that. I’ll have to work on it.
    Anyway, GOOD JOB!!!
    ~Kay Morris♫

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