Maturity is Not Free

Here is part of an article from that I found to be disturbingly true.  Read the rest at

“Dan Kindlon is a psychologist and author of Too Much of a Good Thing: Raising Children of Character in an Indulgent Age.  He recounts meeting with the parents of a 16-year-old boy, enrolled at a prestigious prep school, who was accused of plagiarism and suspended from school for three days.  The punishment was going to result in a serious drop in the boy’s grades, because of the “F” he’d receive on the plagiarized paper, and because of a quiz he’d miss (and be unable to make up) in another class.  And that was all the parents cared about.  “This could hurt him on his college applications,” the mother lamented.  The parents made excuses for their son, and remarked that other kids probably did the same.  They expressed no concern about his character, or why he cheated, or what they could do to help with the larger issues involved.  They couldn’t even acknowledge that there were larger issues involved.

Kindlon, who had worked with the boy and knew of other troublesome behavior on his part, believed that the boy was actually crying out for help.  Kindlon’s take on the situation was this:  “He wants his parents to take a more active role in helping him make the right decisions, because he doesn’t yet have the maturity to make them on his own.  He wants them to set firmer rules, to monitor his behavior more closely, to become more involved in his life.”

Dr. Kevin Leman addresses these issues in his book, Have a New Kid by Friday.  He believes that many modern parents feel responsible for making sure their children are happy — at almost any cost.  As a result, according to Leman, we’re raising a generation of children who “expect anything and everything good to come their way, with no work on their part, just because they exist.  In their eyes, the world owes them – and owes them big time.” ”

If we cannot get over this attitude of “I deserve whatever I want – NOW” then we will never reach the level of maturity necessary to make right decisions on our own, and this will lead to our own downfall!  I’ve been reading through Proverbs, and Solomon places quite a bit of emphasis on the concept of diligence vs. laziness.  Diligence is defined by Webster in three words: a persevering application.  That’s what we need: to take the things that we have learned from the Bible and from our life experience and to apply them without giving up!  Do what you know is right, and do it over and over; that is how you build character.  “The sluggard does not plow in season, so at harvest time he looks and finds nothing.” Proverbs 20:4  If we do not do the necessary work in the planting season, the formative years of our lives, the time for harvest will arrive… and there will be no fruit to show.  Start planting those seeds of maturity and character now, you’ll be glad you did!


1 Comment

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One response to “Maturity is Not Free

  1. Sir Emeth Mimetes


    That was a very good post. Responsibility and maturity are both things that are actually looked down on in today’s society, and it is destroying them. Thank God for the Rebelution!

    With joy and peace in Christ,
    Jay Lauser aka Sir Emeth Mimetes

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